The New York State English Language Arts Test is next week.  The New York State Math Test is the week following.  It’s a busy week around here.

I teach 6th grade English Language Arts, so I’ve been busy getting my students ready for the ELA test next week.

I teach 6th grade math and 7th grade math, so I’ve been busy getting my students ready for the math test in two weeks.

Our testing coordinator, who manages the secure testing materials and assigns and trains proctors and generally runs the show during the NYS tests, is out on maternity leave (she had the most beautiful baby girl last week!) so I am now the testing coordinator.  I’ve been busy getting together the secure testing materials, assigning and training proctors, and generally running the show.

I’m exhausted.  My students are exhausted.

I’m stressed.  My students are stressed.  Their parents are stressed.

What is all of this for?  Evidently, someone somewhere doesn’t trust teachers to do what they’re supposed to do.  Someone decided that the best way to determine whether our children are learning what they need to learn is to give them tests that cover everything they’ve learned in the past year.  That’s right - give them a great big fat test that covers a year’s worth of material.  That way, we can keep track of whether our teachers are actually teaching what they’re supposed to be teaching.

Does that make sense?  Let’s check up on the teachers by bombarding our students with insanely designed and structured high-stakes tests?  Let’s generate enormous amounts of anxiety in our students to see if our teachers are doing a good job?  Something doesn’t compute here.  Teachers should be stressed about whether they’re doing a good job, not students.  Can’t we find a way of evaluating teacher performance by actually evaluating teachers?

Yes, we need to be sure that students are learning.  There are many ways to assess student learning and not all of them involve freaking our kids out with these crazy tests every year.  Besides, not all students test well even though they are learning well.  Shouldn’t we acknowledge that different students have different learning needs?  Shouldn’t we hold teachers accountable for knowing those different needs and helping students learn in ways that best suit them as individuals?  How does a single, high-stakes, standardized test do that?

It doesn’t.

Meanwhile, here we are, my 6th graders and my 7th graders and me, filling our days with preparation for these tests.  Generating tons of anxiety.  Killing a lot of trees as we photocopy practice test after practice test and extra help packets.  Using up our classroom time by focusing on these tests instead of reading great pieces of literature or doing math projects that apply our learning to real-life situations.  Here we are, not really learning anything but getting ready to prove that we’ve learned all that we’re supposed to.

What’s a teacher to do?

No one ever says thank you enough.  Parents don’t hear it enough.  Teachers don’t hear it enough.  Coworkers don’t hear it enough.  It seems we are so busy in our lives and at work that we only stop to ask for help or complain about something.  We’ve lost the time and the instinct to say thank you as frequently as we should.

Today is Administrative Professionals Day.  I shouldn’t wait until a day like today to say thank you to the office staff that makes my school run so smoothly.  Unfortunately, I spend so much time in my classroom, wrapped up in the ins and outs of teaching and behavior management and tween drama, I rarely get the opportunity to head into the office and thank the lovely ladies who let me use the copier when the Risos aren’t working, slip me a ream of colored paper for special memos to be sent home, call parents for me when I just can’t get out of my classroom, and keep my paychecks coming.

Happy Administrative Professionals Day, Ladies.  Thank you for all you do for me and my students and the rest of our amazing school.  We should thank you every day, and I’m sorry we don’t.  Thank you.  Thank you.  Thank you.  Thank you.  You and your hard work are appreciated.

…and teaching is my life.

I know I say it a lot.  Teachers get frustrated a lot.  We’re dealing with children all day, can you blame us?

Sixth graders - 11 year olds - are interesting creatures.  They’re starting to become self aware, and that’s a very scary time for them.  It’s up to the sixth grade teacher, though, to remember that they’re not always self aware.  Some of the things they say and do are very very wacky.

There are some really good moments, though.  There are times when they really love learning.  There are times when they knock my socks off with some amazing insight or a recollection of something I taught months ago.  There are times when they are just sweet little kids.  There are times when you see the glimpses of the adults they will become in the not-so-distant future.  

Then there are times when they drop a kilogram mass on the tile floor in the middle of a science lab and send the adrenaline rushing through your veins as you scramble across the room to see if anyone or anything was broken.

Guess which type of moment I’m having right now.

I love children and teaching is my life.

…prepare to sit separately, especially on a busy day like today.  I’m sorry, group of five who plopped down in the four seats next to me then demanded that I move to another row so they could all sit together, but I chose that seat so that I wouldn’t get squished against the wall and have my bad knee jammed up for 90 minutes.

So you called me names and talked about me like I wasn’t there.  I’ll get over it.

So you shouted over me the whole ride.  My noise canceling earphones did a good job.

Your incessant complaining also motivated me to focus on getting plenty of grading done during the ride, too.

All of that and my bad knee was just a little sore at the end of the ride.  I win!  Play nice, holiday commuters.  I’m ready for you.

…it that it really isn’t that bad.

I mean, I’m cranky no matter what time I wake up.  I’m always tired.  I always want more sleep.  That never changes.

Yeah, I’m up at 3:40am during the week.  I’m cranky about it - for about 5 minutes.  Once I hit the shower, I’m up.

I enjoy the quiet of the house while everyone else is still snoozing away.

I enjoy getting to work early, before everyone else, because the building is quiet and still, and I can hear my own thoughts rattling around in my head.

I enjoy having these precious few moments to myself every morning.

Sure, I’m tired during the day, but isn’t everyone tired during the day?